You probably know that setting goals is essential to being successful in life, but maybe you’re not sure where to start. Maybe you’re trying to help someone else (like your teen or young adult) set goals, and you’re not sure how to help. Well, you’re at the right place – we’ve put together some great tips for you on how to set goals in life.
What are your goals in life? Often when someone says they have a goal, what they really mean is that they are attracted to a vague idea. You may say, “I just want to be happy.” But as Eleanor Roosevelt said, “Happiness is not a goal…it’s a by-product of a life well lived.” A life well lived rarely happens by accident. It is the result of setting and pursuing goals.
If you want to make sure your young adult doesn’t end up being a permanent fixture in your home, it’s important to get them thinking beyond where they are now. Helping them set goals will get them dreaming about a bigger, better future.
Setting Goals That Matter
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Any old goal won’t do. If you want to achieve success in life, you need to set the right goals. Good goals are goals that effectively move you towards the future you want. These are the goals that matter. If you want to succeed, then be clear about what you want and write it down in detail.
Why write it down? A study oat Dominican University in California, found that you are 42 percent more likely to achieve your goals just by writing them down. Other studies have shown that even if you never look at those goals again, you still have a significantly higher chance of achieving those goals as compared to someone who doesn’t write down their goals.
So how do you go about putting your goals in writing? You may find a goal planner helpful, but how do you know what to put it in it?
All successful people have a goal. No one can get anywhere unless he knows where he wants to go and what he wants to be or do.”Norman Vincent Peale
We’ve put together some questions to help you figure out a life that will bring you meaning and a sense of accomplishment. We’ll help you figure out what to write down in that fancy planner.
3 Steps To Setting Good Goals
Good goals start with daydreams, imaginations, and hopes. The worries, struggles, and busyness of life can easily become barriers to dreaming.
Setting good goals starts with taking time to dream. Let go of what others say you or people like you “should” or “can’t” be or do. This is dreamland – there are no limits. Dream big!
Step 1 – Dream Big
Set aside any objections – just for now. Describe your ideal life. Write down whatever comes to mind, even sketch it if that’s more helpful to you. You may find this post on How to Create the Life You Want from the Broken Blessings additionally helpful. After you’ve done this, answer the questions that follow to help you refine your vision.
If you want to be happy, set a goal that commands your thoughts, liberates your energy, and inspires your hopes.”Andrew Carnegie
Step 2 – Set Your Top 3 Personal Goals
We’ve put together three questions to help you identify your guidepost goals. Knowing the answers to these above can help you re-adjust the details of all the other goals in your life to keep you moving towards your dreams. Every other goal you make should move you towards these are your top three goals. Each of these deserves as least a paragraph long answer if not more. Clarity is key.
- How do you want to feel?
- What do you want to experience?
- If your life leaves the world one message, what do you want it to be?
If the world only gets one message from your life, what do you want it to be? #purpose #legacy #goals Click To Tweet
Figuring Out The Most Important Goal In Life
Question three helps you identify your most important goal in life. In the end, what endures is your life’s message.
It’s OK if you don’t have a very clear idea on that yet. Here’s some ideas on how to start figuring that out.
Identify Your Heroes
Who do you admire? Write it down and write down why you admire them.
- What do you especially admire about their lives?
- In what ways have they impact have they made on you?
- What impact have they made on the world?
Identify Your Values
What’s most important to you in terms of being true to who you want to be? For help with this, answer the following questions.
- Is there anything you are willing to die for?
- What things would you not compromise on, no matter how much you were paid?
- How do you want to be seen? What reputation do you want to have?
Identify Your Pain Points
As the saying goes, “Turn your mess into your message.” Some of the most meaningful and powerful work done in the world has come as a result of those who have been through the trenches fighting to overcome.
- What do you want to never go through again?
- What have you gone through that you want to spare others from?
- Who made a big difference for you during a difficult time in your life?
Review your heroes, pain points, and values. Make up a story from these about a person, their life. Write the story to have a powerful and meaningful ending. What’s the message? It is likely your message.
Do be sure to fully work through your pain points before launching on a mission to help others. If you aren’t fully or mostly healed, you may find it to be more than you can handle.
How Guideposts Can Direct Your Goals
Let’s say you’ve determined that being a professional basketball player is your life’s goal. Then one day, you blow your knee out. Career over, dreams crushed. What now? In light of the questions above, consider why you wanted to be a pro basketball player. Know your why.
- Is it for the pay?
- Is it because you like being part of a team?
- Do you like to spend most of your days doing something athletic?
- Did you hope for fame?
- Would it make you feel accomplished?
There are other ways to do all of the above. Even if you didn’t blow out your knee, knowing the answers to the guidepost questions can help you navigate your career.
After you have defined your top three goals, it may be easier to get into the nitty gritty of defining or setting more detailed goals. All of the more detailed goals should move you towards your top three goals in some way.
Step 3 – Create A Life Plan Worksheet
- What are the different relationships you’d like to have in your life?
- Which places you would like to visit?
- What kinds of friends do you want to have?
- Where do you want to live?
- What things do you want to buy?
- If you could win awards, what awards would you want to win?
- What does your spiritual life look like?
- How do you want to be intellectually?
- What kind of home do you want to own?
- How do you want to be emotionally?
- What qualities do you want to develop in yourself?
- How do you want to be physically?
- What hobbies do you want to pursue?
- Who do you want to help?
- What kinds of projects do you want to do?
- How do you want to think and feel about yourself?
- What are your goals educationally?
- What do you want to be a part of?
- How will you know when you have “arrived”?
- What are 10 adjectives that others might use to describe you, when you have reached your goals?
How to Achieve Your Goals and Dreams
To achieve your goals and dreams requires developing a strategy. Once you’ve clearly identified your dreams, break them down into actionable steps and benchmark achievements. These achievements become your goals. This plan is the key to propel you from dreamer to achiever.
Write Down Your Goals
Make sure you’ve clearly written down each of these goals and steps. Don’t just “do it in your head.” Yes, a teenager will probably balk at taking the time to write something down, but it’s worth it.
Just by writing your goals down, you’re leaps and bounds closer to achieving them. According to this article in Forbes, “A Harvard Business Study found that the 3% of graduates from their MBA who had their goals written down, ended up earning ten times as much as the other 97% put together, just ten years after graduation.”
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Make Your Goals SMART
SMART goals are Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, and Time-based. They benefit of SMART goals are that they provide sufficient details and direction to measure success. Review your goals and re-write any that need it as SMART goals.
Break Your Goals Down
The next important step is to define the path to break down your big goals into smaller steps. Take one big goal at a time and write down the steps or supporting action you need to take to get to that goal and write down every supporting action you can think to take you to closer to your big goal.
For instance, if you want to own a home, you’ll probably need to get a loan.
So “get a home loan” goes on your list of goals.
To get a loan, you’ll need a good credit history.
So “build a good credit history” goes on your list.
To build a good credit history you’ll need to get a credit card.
Add “get a credit card.”
For that credit history to be good, you’ll need to pay your credit card bill on time.
Add “pay the credit card bill on time”
To pay your credit card on time, you’ll need to make sure you “stay on top of the payment schedule”… and so on.
Goal Setting Worksheet
Figuring out the path for each piece of your dream life will result in a long master list of goals. We’ve put together this setting goals worksheet to help guide you through building your master list of goals.
Great Life Goals For Teenagers
All the things mentioned above apply to setting goals for your teens. Dream big, don’t judge. And don’t worry if they pick weird or outlandish goals. The exercise of setting goals will help them do a better job creating goals and moving towards success as their goals change.
Goals For High School
If your teenager isn’t sure where to start, start with High School goals. Don’t limit it to just grades, although those are good place to start. Grades are SMART goals – measurable, specific, time-based, actionable, and relevant to success.
Depending on your teen, they could also set goals for pursuing different clubs, behavior benchmarks, or sports. Maybe your teenager’s High School goals include figuring out their social circles and who they want to be.
The teen years are the best years to start setting financial goals. Good money habits started early significantly increase their odds of success.
Consider helping your young adult open a Roth IRA. Did you know that anyone can open a Roth IRA as soon as they’ve worked a job? A Roth will help them start thinking about the big picture – saving, investing, tax implications, and more.
Personal And Professional Goals
Defining professional goals will help your child pick the right strategy for High School. Do they want to work in computers? Do they want to become a musician? Each of these will lay out a different path in the short term.
High school is also a great time to start figuring out personal goals in life. What kinds of relationships do they want? What do they want out of a relationship? These are questions they are likely already navigating subconsciously. Bringing them to the surface will help them move towards who they want to be faster.
Final Thoughts on Setting Goals
Yes, this work of writing up goals takes time and effort, but it’s worth it. You can charge ahead in life with what you feel is the right direction, but speed and effort without direction can only guarantee you exhaustion.
The trouble with not having a goal is that you can spend your life running up and down the field and never score.”Bill Copeland
Get your free pack of printable goal setting worksheets. All the questions above are in downloadable packs & worksheets to help you figure it all out!
One purpose of this blog is to help parents of teens navigate the challenges of preparing their children to be successful independent adults.
Finally Family Homes’ mission is to provide the same kind of support for those teens who don’t have a family or home to help them transition into adulthood. Learn more about how we’re helping aging out foster youth succeed.
We’d love hear more about you! If the world only gets one message from your life, what do you want it to be? How do you want to make your mark in the world?